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3 Oct 2016 |
Spring is the perfect time to do a bit of cleaning - whether it be your garden, your wardrobe or even your relationship with yourself. Isn’t it time you started treating yourself with the same love, kindness and respect that you give the other important people in your life?
Australia's happiness expert Domonique Bertolucci's latest book, The Daily Promise, invites you to make small daily changes to the way you treat yourself; changes that will build your confidence, nurture your self-esteem and allow you to enjoy the life you’re living to its fullest potential and be what you want to be.
We thought we'd share some of her wisdom so you can get a kick-start on giving your attitude a make over.
Your confidence shouldn’t be dependent on the goals you have achieved, nor should it be dependent on the feedback you get from others, your dress size or the amount in your bank account. But if your self-confidence isn’t based on what you’ve got or what you’ve done, how do you build and maintain it?
The answer is simple. Make the commitment to treat yourself with the same kindness you show the most important people in your life.
The First Promise: Accept your imperfections
I am perfectly imperfect.
Perfection is an unachievable goal. Nobody can be perfect … not even you.
I accept my imperfections
There’s no such thing as a perfect person so don’t even try. Instead of making yourself miserable trying to be perfect, enjoy your life and accept that you are perfectly imperfect.
The Second Promise: Always do your best
I always do my best and my best is always good enough
There is a big difference between doing your best and needing to be the best.
I strive for excellence
Needing to be the best is a very risky strategy if you also want to be happy. Every time you set out to be the best you also run the risk of being the worst. Instead of trying to be better than someone else, redirect your energy towards being the very best version of yourself.
The Third Promise: Stop comparing yourself
I have no need to see myself as more or less than anyone else.
In life there is always the good stuff and then there is the rest of it.
I am resilient
Regardless of how it may look from afar, everyone’s life contains ups, downs and a whole lot of in-between. The mark of a happy life is not that it always runs smoothly—it’s how easily you are able to navigate your way around the bumps in the road.
The Fourth Promise: Believe in your potential
I fully expect my life to be happy and rewarding.
Being prepared is the best investment you can make in your future.
I prepare for the future
There’s no point worrying about what tomorrow might bring. A far smarter course of action is to make a plan, set a goal and do what it takes to give yourself the best chance of having your future unfold the way you want it to.
The Fifth Promise: Silence your inner critic
I only welcome thoughts that support and encourage me.
Become your own best friend.
I support and encourage myself
Don’t wait for someone else to boost you up, encourage you or make you feel good about yourself. Instead of looking outside yourself for ways to feel good on the inside, take responsibility for your self-esteem and become your own best friend.
The Sixth Promise: Challenge yourself
I am brave and willing to step outside of my comfort zone.
Stop saying ‘I can’t’. You can … if you want to.
I own my choices
So often when people say ‘I can’t’, what they really mean is, ‘I don’t want to’, ‘I’m not ready to’ or ‘I’m afraid to’. If you don’t want to do something, don’t do it but instead of undermining your confidence by saying ‘I can’t’, be honest with yourself about the real reasons why.
The Seventh Promise: Stop making excuses
I take full responsibility for who I am and the life I lead.
When you commit to yourself and your intentions, the message you send yourself is ‘I am worth this effort’.
I honour my commitments
Don’t say yes to something unless you mean it. Although in the moment you might tell yourself it doesn’t matter, failing to do what you say you are going to do, however insignificant, tells your subconscious that failure is a comfortable state for you.
The Eighth Promise: Love yourself
I always treat myself with love and respect.
Focus on your values and let everything else fall into place.
I know what’s important
Take the time to work out what matters most to you in life. When you know what your values are, your priorities will be clear, decision making will be easy and you will find it easier to live a happier and more fulfilling life.
This is an edited extract from The Daily Promise by Domonique Bertolucci, $19.99 RRP and is available in all good bookshops.